REASONS MOMMY DRINKS

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Reasons Mommy Drinks

Author : Lyranda Martin-Evans
ISBN : 9780385349291
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 35.39 MB
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Based on the popular blog, an uproarious collection of essays on the struggles of new motherhood is complemented by cocktail recipes and shares the stories of two award-winning businesswomen who bonded over their love for their babies and mutual bewilderment at the myriad ways their lives were upended. Original.
Category: Family & Relationships

Why Mummy Drinks

Author : Gill Sims
ISBN : 0008237492
Genre :
File Size : 63.68 MB
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Why Mummy Drinks is the brilliant novel from Gill Sims, the author of the online sensation Peter and Jane. Boy Child Peter, Girl Child Jane and Daddy have exciting adventures with Mummy. Daddy likes gadgets. Peter and Jane like starting fires, trying to kill each other and driving Mummy to drink. Written from the point of view of an exhausted mummy at the end of the day, it's honest, it's funny, and it's a little bit sweary. It is Mummy's 39th birthday. She is staring down the barrel at a future of people asking if she wants to come to their yoga class, and book clubs, where everyone is wearing statement scarves and they are all 'tiddly' after a glass of Pinot Grigio. But Mummy does not want to go quietly into that good night of women with sensible haircuts who 'live for their children', boasting about Boy Child and Girl Child's achievements. Instead, she clutches a large glass of wine, muttering FML over and over, and then remembers the gem of an idea she's had...
Category:

Reasons My Kid Is Crying

Author : Greg Pembroke
ISBN : 9780804139847
Genre : Humor
File Size : 41.78 MB
Format : PDF, ePub, Docs
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A glimpse into the tribulations of parenting that is part documentary, part therapy, and completely hilarious. It all started when busy father Greg Pembroke posted a few pictures online of his three-year-old son, mid-tantrum, alongside the reason his son was crying: He had broken his bit of cheese in half. In Reasons My Kid is Crying, Greg collects together photos sent from parents around the world, documenting the many, completely logical reasons why small children cry. Among them: “I let him play on the grass” . . . “He ran out of toys to throw into his pool” . . . “The neighbor’s dog isn’t outside”. The result is both an affectionate portrait of the universal, baffling logic of toddlers—and a reminder for burned-out parents everywhere that they are not alone.
Category: Humor

Moms Who Drink And Swear

Author : Nicole Knepper
ISBN : 9781101650943
Genre : Biography & Autobiography
File Size : 70.5 MB
Format : PDF, Mobi
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If you feel like your kids are killing you, you’ve come to the right place. Attention all potty-mouthed, cheap-wine-drinking mothers: Prepare to meet your match. Any bad thought you’ve had about your kids, Nicole Knepper has had worse. Much worse. It’s not that she doesn’t love her kids. It’s that she understands what a mind-f*?% it can be to try to civilize those wild little beasts. Based on her hugely popular Facebook page, “Moms Who Drink and Swear,” this book reveals why family dinners are like herpes, how to avoid smashing toys that are being fought over, and the joy of hearing that your son has murdered his imaginary friend. As Nicole rants and raves about caring for children (without crushing their souls), family togetherness (without too many tears), the saving grace of girlfriends (and vodka), and love and marriage (and all the baggage that goes with them), she gets to the heart of what every exasperated mom is thinking, just much funnier.
Category: Biography & Autobiography

Bro Code For Parents

Author : Barney Stinson
ISBN : 9781451690644
Genre : Humor
File Size : 45.77 MB
Format : PDF, ePub, Mobi
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The newest book in the New York Times bestselling “Barney Stinson” canon teaches prospective parents everything they need to know to have a legendary kid. So you’re going to be a parent. You might be asking yourself a series of important questions: Will I be a good parent? • Will I be able to afford this? • Can I ever have sex again? Well, the answer to all these questions is a rock-solid no. But just because your existence is now a petrifying turd on the canvas of life doesn’t mean your kid has to be as lame as you’re about to become. That’s why I’ve written this book—to teach you how to be an awesomommy or legendaddy. The Bro Code for Parents will help you: Choose a baby name that won’t get your kid stuffed into a junior high locker • Interview and hire a smokin’ hot nanny • Teach your child instant classics like “The Boobs on the Bus” and “Bro, Bro, Bro Your Boat” With full-color illustrations, interactive work sheets, and even suggestions for how to turn a stroller into a broller, The Bro Code for Parents gives you all the tools you’ll need to raise your child to be almost as awesome as I am. Almost.
Category: Humor

The Mommy Diet

Author : Alison Sweeney
ISBN : 9781439180952
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 62.80 MB
Format : PDF
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As a working mom who looks hotter than ever after two pregnancies, Alison Sweeney knows what it takes to look and feel great during pregnancy and how to get back in shape post-baby. (Yes, it’s possible!) In The Mommy Diet, she shares tons of straightforward tips, personal anecdotes, easy-to-follow exercises, fashion insight, nutrition advice, and even a few of her favorite quick, easy recipes. The Mommy Diet helps moms-to-be stay fit, positive, and pampered during pregnancy and then steers new moms to a healthy recovery and body confidence after the baby is born. It’s a warm, accessible, funny guide to everything from prepregnancy through the first nine months postpartum—an especially crucial time for new moms who want to shed their baby weight safely and establish a fitness routine—and beyond. Sweeney, who is busy taking care of two children and juggling two jobs, breaks pregnancy down trimester by trimester, addressing everything from morning sickness and food cravings to sexy maternity style, all the while reminding readers to keep up with exercise as long as their doctors approve. After the baby arrives, she details the perils and pitfalls of carrying around postpregnancy weight and how to navigate the sleep deprivation, not to mention the shell-shocked stress of all the changes to daily life. You can eat healthfully, be physically fit, look great, and find time to take care of yourself while you learn to be a terrific new mom. The realistic, affordable, and doable advice in The Mommy Diet will show you how.
Category: Family & Relationships

W H Ine

Author : Jennifer Todryk
ISBN : 9781631063350
Genre : Cooking
File Size : 24.34 MB
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This isn't your ordinary wine pairing book--this is wine pairing for the weary parent! Did your daughter just get out of bed for the twelfth time to ask for a glass of water? We've got the perfect ros� for your sanity. Did your son just have a meltdown in the middle of the grocery store? We've got a Pinot for your pain. Has your child's math homework left you in a state of total depression? Try a Syrah to get you out of that funk. W(h)ine includes fifty perfect pairings to match your child's perfectly rotten behavior! You'll also discover the best ways to open a wine bottle without a corkscrew (hint: use a shoe). As a bonus, each wine featured in the book comes with a sticker, so every time you sample a wine to match a rotten behavior, go ahead and add it to the Periodic Table of W(h)ine that folds out of the book. The sticker groupings will help you determine if your child has behavior problems, attitude problems, or just plain bad DNA! So whether you like your "juice" from the glass, the bottle, or the box, this is the perfect book to wine your way through the joys of day-to-day parenting.
Category: Cooking

Just Let Me Lie Down

Author : Kristin van Ogtrop
ISBN : 9780316088541
Genre : Biography & Autobiography
File Size : 42.31 MB
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Kristin van Ogtrop knows she's lucky--fulfilling career, great husband, three healthy kids, and, depending on the hamster count, an impressive roster of pets. She also knows she is tired. Always. Using stories and insights from her own life, she provides a lexicon for the half-insane working mom. Anyone who has left a meeting to race to the Halloween parade immediately understands van Ogtrop's definition of "Kill the messenger" as "The action you must take in order to forget about the office for a time--that is, to remove your Blackberry/Treo/iPhone/whatever from your person and store it as far away as your neurotic self will allow." Filled with essays, lists, and resonant observations, JUST LET ME LIE DOWN establishes van Ogtrop as the Erma Bombeck of the new millennium.
Category: Biography & Autobiography

Hurrah For Gin

Author : Katie Kirby
ISBN : 9781473639591
Genre : Humor
File Size : 84.23 MB
Format : PDF, Mobi
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The perfect gift for Mother's Day, this book is not a how-to-guide. It won't tell you how to get your baby to sleep, how to deal with toddler tantrums, how to be a good parent, a cool parent or even a renegade parent. It is a book about parenting that contains absolutely no useful advice whatsoever. Instead it shares beautifully honest anecdotes and illustrations from the parenting frontline that demonstrate it is perfectly possible to love your children with the whole of your heart whilst finding them incredibly irritating at the same time. From pregnancy to starting school, Hurrah For Gin takes you through the exciting, frustrating, infuriating and wonderful whirlwind of parenthood, offering solidarity and a friendly hug after a tough day. Best served with gin.
Category: Humor

The Grapes Of Wrath

Author : John Steinbeck
ISBN : 9780670016914
Genre : Fiction
File Size : 74.21 MB
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Depicts the hardships and suffering endured by the Joads as they journey from Oklahoma to California during the Depression.
Category: Fiction